Day 9: Something I have to forgive myself for.

Its hard being a kid and growing up. But its even harder trying to mesh with new people to trying to form a new family. I was only 15 when my parents separated, which started another roller coaster ride in my life. Of course my parents weren't going to just be alone for the rest of their lives.

Its hard seeing your parents with other people, especially at first. I had a really hard time adjusting to that. I wasn't very nice to the people my parents introduced to Britney and I, especially my dad's now fiance, Tonya and her kids.

I now know that every family has a different way of living, and our families were totally different in that aspect. I'm not very apt to change, I love having a routine and knowing what to expect each day, and when our families combined into one house, that was very nerve-racking. I was torn out of my house that I grew up in and put in a new home with new people who I didn't even know. I reacted in a very negative way towards them and my attitude got the best of me.

So what I have to forgive myself for is not being the nicest person to those people, and I know they have forgiven me, but I just have to forgive myself for it, too.

Day 8: A picture of you and your friends

In our lives we will have hundreds of friends that come and go. But there are friends who will never leave your side. It was really hard deciding what picture I should put up for this certain blog post! These 5 girls I have known since 7th grade in Jr. High and we have had so many great times together! This is one of my favorite pictures of all time (We don't have the real one yet.. but I'll change it as soon as I get it!) All 5 of us got maried in the same year and we had a blast going to each others weddings. I love seeing how each of us have branched out with our lives, meeting the wonderful guys we have married, and I'm looking forward to how all our kids will turn out. Sinda, Lindsi, Kayla and Roxy... love you girls!

Day 7: Have you ever thought about giving up on life?

There have been plenty of times where I have given up on things.. jobs, projects, food, relationships, etc. But there is one thing that I will NEVER give up on: LIFE. There are lots of times when I get stressed and worked up over something and I just think 'I give up!' Life can get hard sometimes, but you can never just give up, you don't get anywhere in life just 'giving up'.

There is only one time in my life where I actually thought I couldn't handle anything anymore, 2003. It was the worst year of my life. The year my parents divorced, my dad moved out and we had to handle going back and forth, deciding who to live with (I know it doesn't seem like much but to a 15 year old, its pretty tough), meeting new boyfriends and new girlfriends, it was just a lot. I went to my Aunt Wendy for advice all the time, we spent plenty of time over at Doug's playing with Ethan and hanging out with Wendy, going to Smith's 12 times in one weekend with Doug. November that year was when Wendy died. My whole life and family fell apart that year. That was my breaking point. I just thought 'I'm done, I can't handle it anymore.' That when when I really gave up on life. What was the point when there were so many negative things happening and nothing was going right?

We all have ups and downs and we just have to remember that we all have great people in our lives to fall back on and help us out with our problems. Nothing is worth quitting, ever. You will get through your problems, you just have to put in a little effort.

A New Beginning..

I have to take a break from my 30 Day Blog Challenge. I have such great news! Joey found a new job! He is so excited to work for this company, its called Shamrock Plumbing, it will be the biggest plumbing outfit he has ever worked for. He is all about being in charge and being a leader, but with this company he will have to work his way up in the chain, and for right now.. he is okay with that! He told me he is excited to just go to work and be with a team that works together and have people to go to when he has questions. Hopefully this will be the place for him.. we'll just have to wait and see how it works out, cross your fingers!

Day 6: A funny (and true) story.

When my dad lived in Santa Fe apartments, Britney and I would visit every other weekend. Almost every Saturday night we were with him we would get pizza and watch a movie. There was one particular weekend I will never forget.

Britney, only 11 at the time, was sitting on the floor picking out a movie. As she was putting Wayne's World into the vcr she ripped the loudest fart I have ever heard! As I started laughing my Dad calmy picks up the phone and dials a number. This is how his conversation went:

"Hello, Mr. President? I would like to inform you that no, that was not an earthquake we just had, it was just my daughter farting. Good talking to you, bye!"

We laughed together all night long, I think I actually laughed myself to sleep that night.

Day 5: What have you learned in the past month?

This month, I have not really learned anything new, but I have had a reminder of the past. It was right before Joe and I were married that the economy took a turn for the worst. He lost his job from the best company he could ever work for, CPI. Luckily, because of his positive attitude and his great work ethic a company took him in just 2 days later.

Now... almost 3 years later, its happening again. Joe will most likely lose his job again this month. I thought things were looking up and getting better. I guess not for everyone. Going through all this again has reminded me of what life is all about, what marriage is all about. I know that no matter what happens I can depend on my husband and he can depend on me just the same.
I know we will get through this rough patch, we have done it before and we will probably have to go through it again, that is just the way the world turns.

I am a firm believer that when one door closes, another one opens. Joe is the most motivated and positive person I know and we will be fine in the long run, its the little bumps in the road that make you stronger.

He deserves much better. Eventually all his hard work will pay off.

Day 4: The reason you believe you are alive today

This is a pretty tough question...

I think the reason I am alive today is because I have only been on this earth 23 short years, I am just beginning to start my life!

I haven't even started what I'm supposed to do here, I want to have kids with Joe and start a family, I want to go above and beyond with my career and start a business of my very own (Joe is convinced that I'm going to buy out Paul Mitchel..)

I work hard and play harder, my life has just begun!

So the answer is pretty simple after all...

I'M NOT DONE YET!